A letter from a Pirate King y'all!

"Oh Dearest Queen,

Me read yer message and me wa like..
What in tarnation is happnin'..
Wer yer time flashin back to the Spaniard time aye?
Me think on ye lass..
All the time me lovely queen..
Yer winds me blow and yer waves me crash..
But yer always no that me sendes me deepest devotions to yer..
me beloved queen..
Me feel it such an honor to be treatin' yer doin' to me..
Me feels like the seas all calm coz of yer love and care..
aye.. my dear lass.. yer always in me heart..
yer always in me mind..
and one day..
me ship me sailin' gonna dock at yer arms..
till that day.. me gonna tell the wind to send ye me sweetest love..
sweeter than all yer pickles and eggs..

Me love yer highness..

Yer First Mate,
Your Pirate King "


-Amateur,no? Haha. Still the best.